Spinning Grief Into Guns

First, let me drop to my badly bruised knees and thank the sweet Lord that nobody gives an impacted dootie bubble what I say or think about anything. If I believed otherwise, I would immediately slice my own tongue off, break my fingers, and curl up in a fetal ball beneath a solid rocket booster.

That said, here's what I think is going to happen as a result of the attacks in London: a bunch of smarty-pants doofuses with terrible haircuts are going to append the incident to their in-process white papers as an ad hominem argument in support of their sweeping plans to remake the world in their own image. Meanwhile, bone-stupid terrorists who think themselves terribly clever for bringing global attention to their hopelessly provincial delusions will continue to preoccupy the best and brightest minds in the world; which will inevitably result in a gross over-estimation of their tactical designs and political wherewithal. This, in turn, will cause an even greater emphasis to be placed on developing weapons in space.

As for the "liberal agenda", the President has spoken:

…we have people here who are working to alleviate poverty, to help rid the world of the pandemic of AIDS, working on ways to have a clean environment.

And that, ladies & gentlemen, is George W. Bush addressing poverty, AIDS & the environment. Did you enjoy it?