I'm Lonely
"Step 1: Buy yourself a rock melon, canteloupe, or honeydew melon. Cut a round hole in one end a bit smaller than your dick. Scoop out a little of the inside but not too much. Step 2: Nuke it good. Heat the melon in a microwave (be careful!) and squirt in some baby oil. Step 3: Ahhhhh! Step 4: (Optional): On the opposite side of the melon from where your penis enters it, make a small hole with a skewer or small knife, no bigger than a pencil eraser, but reaching all the way in to the "vagina." Wrap your hand around the melon after you insert your erection and put your finger over the hole on the outstroke. Remove your finger on the in-stroke, replace it over the hole on the outstroke. Feels like a mouth going down on your cock, then sucking on it as it draws back." [Source (NSFW)]
4 Comments:
Excellent use of the materiality of eating, sex and bodies in order to draw out alternative ways of thinking about an ethics of existence, about ways of living informed by both the rawness of a visceral engagement with the world, and a sense of restraint in the face of the excess.
Aw, c'mon now!! It's fucking a melon! Not writing the consti-fucking-tution, for pete's sake.
Fuck a melon. Go ahead. Shtup, shtup, shtup away. But it's still fucking a melon. You want existentialism: fuck a woman in the mouth, pay a shitload, one way or the other, for the privilege, but imagine that you're really fucking a melon! Try that on for size.
Um...why not just by a masturbation sleave that you can reuse and not have to worry about bacteria. Oh yes, there is bacteria in fruit. But, hell. It's your dick...
pathetic. for who ever even thinks about trying this, i hope your penis' fall off becuase you dont deserve one.
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