I’m going to be perfectly clear. I know full well that my opinions don’t matter. I understand (and often hope) that I lack the ability to influence the opinion of others. My gaudy tirades are essentially prayers – piping hot content for the Akashic records. Today, my prayer is this: Oh God…please, PLEASE…don’t let Kerry pick Gephardt. The reasons to avoid the Gep are too numerous to go into here. Suffice it to say that he’s political poison.

There. Now that I’ve gotten that off my sunken and pasty chest, here’s another thought: fuck baseball. Yeah, that’s right. You heard me. Let’s take a little trip down memory lane. A couple of months ago Major League Baseball struck a deal with Columbia Pictures to advertise the film Spider-Man 2. Baseball fans across the country went into apoplectic shock at the perceived indignity to their beloved sport. As a direct result of the hue and cry, the deal was dissolved. It ought to have been movie fans that protested. Spider-Man 2 is awesome. Did you hear me? I said “It. Is. Awesome.” Period.